the only things keeping me from madness are coffee and smoking, also might be whats keeping people away from me.
lets face it when you get older it gets harder to make new friends. i think that a lot of people my age don’t feel they have time to get to know some one new, they have friends, people they have known for years, it falls on there friends to bring new people into the fold… to be a friend of a friend. i sort of fear that this “making friends or being open to others” thing is all my doing, i’m not to aware of how i come across to others, what my first impression is, i smoke and drink and cuss, i’m not that approachable, or at least that is the feeling i get. i am told when school starts ill make friends, the cynic in me finds that hard to believe, but that’s my hang up (i think ill be surrounded by young-ins who are more style than substance)
this school thing is exiting. but it is also totally alien to me, i’m scared shit less. also something about being in a “collage town” makes me feel uneasy it brings out the frat boy in every one, or rather there’s a lot of frat boys and “frat culture” it seeps into the night life of the city. i can escape into the woods when ever i want to, but i love city’s there is a reason i haven’t moved to the country.
i’m loosing my train of thought, or what ever you might call what iv typed up there.
the east is beautiful the east is fun the east is not my bag.